i'm a wuss

and i kill animals.

unborn animals.

turtles?

remember all those touching nature shows where Mom Turtle cries real tears giving birth to millions of eggs? and the pathos, the absolute inspiring moment when all the eggs hatch into cute little turtle juniors who look just like Mom, and the lively scramble when all of them lil' buddies dash madly for the water??

well, when was young, i remember watching that on tv. i remember too, going to geylang market with my mom, and yes, vague memories of buying turtle - turtle! - eggs, and reminiscence of her tipping some (liquid baby turtles) down my young, unsuspecting gullet.

yuck.

well yuck again. cos this afternoon, my mom excitedly calls me upon coming home from her market trip. she shows me four ping pong balls in a plastic. come, eat! she says. Turtle eggs! your favourite. Since when?? i shriek. last time u small u like to eat... nice la, just eat!

so... shudder...

i took one egg, slightly smaller than a ping pong ball, minus the plasticky texture, and pinched it open. i was supposed to smash it first apparently, to mix the yolk and albument, but hey, this is bad enough already. a colourless watery liquid drips from the torn egg, i take a halfhearted lick, the rest pools on the table. then the pale yellow yolk; i took a tiny bite, a powdery vaguely eggy stuff coats my tongue. at this moment, a vision of those little buddies swimming into my mouth. i hastily pushed the rest to my mom, who laughed and popped it all in(minus the shell), chewing with apparent enjoyment.

shudder.

i'm a baby turtle killer...